Confounded Accusations

It's true. Watch your back.

hey, this guy i work with. His name is Lote, died the other day in a car accident. He was a nice dude. We weren't close but i liked him. I felt comfortable around him which is uncommon. I'm sad to see him go and wish him all the best with this dead thing. Seriously. He was cool and it's like, people die and you can never predict who it's going to be. Give me one hundred guesses and i'd have never figured that Lote would be the person in my life to pass. I don't know what that means but as the cliche sentiment goes, tell people that you love them. Never know what might happen.

Polk sees pixel.

i like the beat for The Message, the Grandmaster Flash and Furious 5 song. I think you could do anything over that track and it'd be golden. Read the phonebook? GOLDEN. Broken Glass Everywhere.
Why have i been subbing lately? Don't ask me. It's a total mystery. I give up saturdays. Just cause. I mean, I can use the skrill and i don't have anything else to do. I'd just be loafing around watching bootleg fight tapes or flipping my compost. Boring. I oughta go on safari or some shit. Go and bow hunt with The Nuge' i spelled that The Nug' before i got it right. I think I should go by The Nug from now forth. Believe that, The Nug is gonna be huge. Spread through your hometown like a Mongol hoard/control the board/from the begining til the last point scored.
Uhm, we just got mexican food. It was good. I had shrimps. They where like, firm but still soft. Prolly swimming around the pacific earlier this week. All happy and shit. Now they're chewed up and soon to be swimming around in my toilet, and shit. That should make me sad. It makes me laugh though. What does that say about me?
Wow, this is going well so far. Very deep and introspective. I think that this post maybe is more of me being me. Me being real then anything I've written since my high school year book quote: Don't doubt the clout/ You know what I'm about/knockin' niggas off/knockin' niggas out.
Let me see, what else is cooking? Nada, nadita. That's like a smaller version of nothing. Not next to nothing. It's the flip side of that. A little less then nothing. Does anyone read blogs? Outside of your friends? I want to know that. I get hits here. I have a tracker, People look at this. Be heard. Just leave a post so I know that I'm not alone out here. This is how Jenny Lewis from Rilo Kiley puts it.


Any asshole can open up a museum.
Put all of the things he loves on display
so everyone could see them.
The house, a car, a thoughtful wife
ordinary moments in his ordinary life.

But if she breaks a smile, she'll give you away
'cause no one wants to pay to see your happiness.
No one wants to pay to see your day to day
and I'm not buying it either
but I'll try selling it anyway.


That about says it. Be nice.

i looked at myself today and saw the truth, i have put on a lot of weight. I suspected as much but today, for the first time i saw the extent of the damage. It sucks. The thing about weight is that you can take it off. I struggle with my weight like constantly. I'm lazy and vain and i love salty snacks.
Shit, i better start doing something about this A.S.A.P (say a-sap) cause i'm not getting any younger huh? I reckon ten lbs or so should do it. I think that i wrote all this already. Hold on. I just remembered that i left the fridge open. I closed it and now i'm back. That was very interesting.
Maritza is gone again today. Rohi came by with her girls today and they all played together. That was fun. They all liked the new swing set. We caught her oldest, Ivy feeding her sister popcorn like you would to a dog. Made her get on all fours and the whole kit. I'm running zelly a bath right now. She's gonna hop in as soon as she finishes watching this tape i made her of all these random Morrissey videos. Mostly off of VH1 classics but also some live performances from talk shows in support of his last record, You Are The Quarry. She loves that tape. I need to back it up in case of breakage. Man, i can just imagine the day that happens. It'd be worst then The Hindenberg. "Oh the humanity" funny. She'll cry so much. Maybe i shouldn't back it up just to force that situation. It'd teach her a lesson about appreciating what you have, like while you have it.
The Courtney story is almost at an end. She's thinking that she's going to go to Santa Barbara to apply for a job of some sort. I think that i'll miss her. Except for my most recent stretch i see her just about everyday. I gave her a tour of the basement the other day. I wonder if she's the first vagrant to ever be treated to such a luxury? Prolly. I only did it cause she looked really cute. Isn't that funny. I'm crushing on a bum. I think that was an episode of Seinfeld. Elaine dated a bum. They called him the Green Lantern cause at first they suspected that he might be hiding a secret identity cause he wouldn't let anyone go to his house. Thing was, what he was hiding was that he didn't have a house. Hilarity ensued.

went to a flea market at the Vets bldg yesterday. It was ok. I picked up six issues of Kamandi The Last Boy On Earth. I love that book. I hope to have a full set soon. It's all funny and shit. Look at the link behind this. I think it explains the book better then i can. Well, i could do it pretty well but i gotta get ready to go to work. Speaking of which i subbed a day at the Rincon Valley branch liberry. That was pretty fun. Really slow though, i don't know how those kids working there get through the day. I'd kill myself outta boredom. It is a nice branch. Nothing like central. No homeless, no crazies. Since i'm on the subject of homelss, i haven't seen Courtney in a week. I hope that no one chopped off her head and stuffed her into a drainage pipe. That would make me sad.
Wow, this is boring. I hope that you stuck it out this far. No i don't care really. Sorry. I'm just like that sometimes. Zelly wants to go and draw on the sidewalk with chalk. I think that is a pretty good time but it's already so hot. I'm debating if i should take my bike to work. I prolly should, i put on like, 10 lbs around the middle during the winter, gotta get it off. Some of my fave shirts don't fit, it's me and my love of late night snacks. I have little willpower when ice cream is offered. I'm weak, especially if it's chocolate. Thing is that my long distance cruiser is on the fritz so i have to take my slow old blue Schwinn Hollywood. It's a beauty of a bike but for miles it's difficult. i need to nut up and do it.. Quit being such a puss...

Maritza's out of town on account of work. It kind of sucks. It's lonely when me and Zelly get left behind because we both miss the same person and only find a little bit of comfort in each other. It's almost as if we both don't really know whose in charge or what the heck we're gonna eat or if we should watch Mr. Rogers or Modern Marvels. Either one is allright on the real, but that's totally off point.
Not that i'm not a good leader but we both know that even though I'm the main disciplinarian and baby watcher that the ultimate say in regards to child stuff goes to Maritza. It's prolly for the best. I think that women have instincts and that while men can learn kid stuff instinct is way better. WAY better. Like in a big way.
Me and Rohi took our respective broods over to Toob Town. It's this pay-park for kids with all these climby tubes and jumpy ball rooms and whatever else. It only cost five bucks and considering that i also got to go in and muck around in the tubes it was money well spent. I climbed all over the place. The ceilings were as high as a high school gym and the tubes went all the way up there and all bendy and weird in every other direction. One tube led way the hell up into the lights and had this massive, practically straight down bright yellow plastic slide. It was fun and all but i'm stiff in the knees from crawling about on hard plastic. Is it worth it in the end?
Zelly was nervous and cautious about her climbing at first but by the end was doing shit that she couldn't when we got there. All in all it was fun.
I think i might go to bed soon. I feel kind of sad for Zelly sleeping by herself. Ya, she still sleeps in bed. It's difficult to have her in another room while we're all asleep. It's nerve wracking. I don't know how we're gonna get over this hurdle. Prolly buy a Doberman pup that she can raise and have sleep in there with her. Not sure.

This just in, Ms Baker is gay. Source? A post on the corner of Mission and Montecito.

one day i'll be wondering how i got so old just wandering around. That's what i heard everytime i heard this song by The Shins. It turns out that it wasn't what was said at all. Does that make that line mine? Maybe. Not like I need to lay claim, i'm just curious if misunderstanding makes equals creation. I think i'd have to say that it's a line i thought up that was inspired by something. Like those soundtracks that come out after the real soundtracks. The ones that are full of songs that weren't actually in the movie. Just inspired by the movie.
I love that line though. It sums up being alive really well. Where does all the time go? It makes me wonder if it's worth it to do anything that doesn't amuse you? I mean you have to pay rent and shit but outside of that what is the point of leaving anything behind. Like trying to write or draw or anything. Who is gonna give a shit who you where after your gone? Not me that's for sure. Once your silly ass is in the dirt you're as good as forgotten.
We're having big time money problems. What's new? Loan me some cash. I think that, no don't cause then i'll have to pay it back and that's a problem in it's self.
On another not my compost heap is doing well. It's all hot in the center. It's gross. I stuck my arm up in it and got scorched..

Courtney

MAN, it is HOT. It's hott in here. I like hot but today is making me tired. i mowed the back yard and was all gonna weed whack too but, man it's thermal. I think i melted when i was last out there. Zelly is still out there playing. I don't know how she doesn't broil. She only weighs 3o lbs so i'd think by being outside for hours she'd at least get a little crispy on the outside but nope. Maybe i should drip some olive oil on her.

Orson Scott Card said, and it may not be the first time that someone said this. I don't know but anyway he said: People are free, til there is a war. Don't really have a comment on this. I just think it's food for thought. Makes me wonder if that's why it seems like we're always in a war or what passes for war nowadays.
It's not like i think that the man is like all running around trying to keep me down, I'm not that sort, but conflict makes it real easy to control your constituants and gives lots of reasons to get folks to do whatever it is that you think they ought to be doing, or not doing. I don't know. Food for thought.
I wrote that last part an hour ago. I went outside and made a wooden frame to encase the area for my compost heap. I used a hammer and a table saw as well as a standard saw, the kind mountain folk play if they be the jug band type. it was fun. I got sweaty and shit. I think that i need to do that kind of stuff more often. I'm not good at it but i did take two years of wood shop in high school so i know my way around tools, at least enough to know what they get called and stuff.
On a side note when he was in 7th grade my brother Dave chopped his finger off in shop class. I remember coming home and having my cousin Jason tell me what happened and my first question was something like : Did they find it? or some stupid shit like that. They did find it and sewed it back on. He's right as rain nowadays, at least in the thumb dept.