Saturday, March 26, 2005
i didn't spell that.
cow mask
big fcontrol panel in closed stacks. That's where we keep old shit. It's spooky and cool back there.
knob.
discards, these get burned up..
Thursday, March 24, 2005
POLK
Tuesday, March 22, 2005
Well, that last post was gay. I was in such a bad mood. I ran out of my Effexor on a weekend so, listen, it's confusing ok..? I didn't have any or any way of getting any till Monday. So, I blew a head pipe. It sucked ass. I hate it when I go crazy, plus I hadn't done so in a real long time so I had that going for me and seeing it ruined like that really, really was wiggidy-wac.
I don't want to get into my fit but it involved me throwing Happy Meal prizes out of the car window and then jumping out at an intersection, in a super bad ass rain storm mind you, and then walking home like a dickehead all wet and shit. I am stupid.
Sara stayed over the night the other night. It was a slumber party. I'll post a pic of her lolly-gagging on my couch in her silly P.Js later. We didn't do anything that cool. Walked my dogs, ate food, watched Ashton Kutcher on SNL. He is a funny kid when he acts stupid. Which I don't really think he is in real life. Not that he's a genius or whatev' I just don't think he's a dip-shit.
Kind of getting stressed with gearing up for A.P.E and all that. It's a nerve racking thing, presenting my work in a public forum. Ugh, I wish that I didn't have to go but A.P.E is the penultimate place for pretty goth chicks and suicidal teenagers, as such i'd be lame not to go. They, the chicks and S.T's might think i'm like some brooding, sullen indie-comic dream date. I mean, i am but the rest of the world isn't really aware yet. I will be unleashed. Go to A.P.E on saturday and you'll see. Say you read my blog and i'll give you some free shit, like a handshake and the advice that you should spend your time on better things...
I don't want to get into my fit but it involved me throwing Happy Meal prizes out of the car window and then jumping out at an intersection, in a super bad ass rain storm mind you, and then walking home like a dickehead all wet and shit. I am stupid.
Sara stayed over the night the other night. It was a slumber party. I'll post a pic of her lolly-gagging on my couch in her silly P.Js later. We didn't do anything that cool. Walked my dogs, ate food, watched Ashton Kutcher on SNL. He is a funny kid when he acts stupid. Which I don't really think he is in real life. Not that he's a genius or whatev' I just don't think he's a dip-shit.
Kind of getting stressed with gearing up for A.P.E and all that. It's a nerve racking thing, presenting my work in a public forum. Ugh, I wish that I didn't have to go but A.P.E is the penultimate place for pretty goth chicks and suicidal teenagers, as such i'd be lame not to go. They, the chicks and S.T's might think i'm like some brooding, sullen indie-comic dream date. I mean, i am but the rest of the world isn't really aware yet. I will be unleashed. Go to A.P.E on saturday and you'll see. Say you read my blog and i'll give you some free shit, like a handshake and the advice that you should spend your time on better things...
Monday, March 21, 2005
do you find it as hard to deal with people's moods as i do ? It seems sometimes that the more i'm up the more other people are down. Mental health is easy. It's way easier then i thought initially. Here's the deal. Figure out if you have a medical condition or if you have an issue of some sort. Ok, issue, then you talk about it, i guess. That's sissy shit (just kidding, no i'm not, yes i am) If you have a medical prollem then just take your meds and shut the fuck up. Easy enough. Some people make it really hard. Some people are dumb. Way dumb.
Friday, March 18, 2005
TGIF, one of the most insipid but also truest little, whatever it is thing you call it when all the letters mean a word, like N.S.A, oh shit! I had the freakiest fucking dream last night. Ok, here on my blog i said that i was, shit i don't even want to type it. I said that i was going to do like Booth did Lincoln. I wonder if that's enough to trip some kind of alarm at that army base Mathew Broderick got drug to in War Games? Hope not. So i typed that and some freaky ass feds in black ski masks bust down the door and beat my ass and totally ruptured my frame. Then they sprayed some kind of foam that hardened inside my mouth and stopped me from making any noise. They took me off to some room and interogated me in a very ruinous fashion. I shudder now thinking about it. Like i do when i think of that freaky ass video in the Ringu. I've actually never seen it. Keepin' shit real.
That sucked. I'm listening to this record by the perceptionists. It's Mr.Lif from Company Flow. He's the one that's not El P and some other talented kids. Whatever, though the album is real good if you like that rugged indy hip hop kind of stuff. It's sort of industrial sounding and kind of just, post old school style production shit. I like it. It's raw and cerebral in the way that rap has to be well written so that you have to rewind and re-listen, so that you can understand what the M.C just said. On this song Blo, that's what it's called Lif is using this speedy down south rhyme flow, sort of. It's cool and kind of weird DJ Fakts One remind me of The Poison Clan.
Sara is coming up tomorrow to spend the night. Maritza wants to play Scrabble. I think that is a damn fine idea. We can smoke, drink, talk and compete at the same silly time.
I think this song, i'm still listening to The Perceptionists, is on the CD twice. They do that a lot on rap discs. Weird. Rap fans are kind of obsessive remix , b-sides collectors. I think that rock fans like concerts. I mean they collect live show bootlegs. That's what i read in magazines anyhow.
That sucked. I'm listening to this record by the perceptionists. It's Mr.Lif from Company Flow. He's the one that's not El P and some other talented kids. Whatever, though the album is real good if you like that rugged indy hip hop kind of stuff. It's sort of industrial sounding and kind of just, post old school style production shit. I like it. It's raw and cerebral in the way that rap has to be well written so that you have to rewind and re-listen, so that you can understand what the M.C just said. On this song Blo, that's what it's called Lif is using this speedy down south rhyme flow, sort of. It's cool and kind of weird DJ Fakts One remind me of The Poison Clan.
Sara is coming up tomorrow to spend the night. Maritza wants to play Scrabble. I think that is a damn fine idea. We can smoke, drink, talk and compete at the same silly time.
I think this song, i'm still listening to The Perceptionists, is on the CD twice. They do that a lot on rap discs. Weird. Rap fans are kind of obsessive remix , b-sides collectors. I think that rock fans like concerts. I mean they collect live show bootlegs. That's what i read in magazines anyhow.
Monday, March 14, 2005
So, this is monday. Kind of like a lot of other mondays that i've been through. i'm wearing headphones, playing a new Gorillaz song. It's called Dirty Harry. Sara, I'll play it for you when you come down. It's all right. I loved, LOVED the Gorillaz first LP. My only complaint was that there wasn't enough Miho Hatori. (Did you know Hatori meand solitary in Japanese, that's cool.) The song is called Dirty Harry, i wonder if the next record will feature a jam called Unforgiven or Million Dollar Baby. Maybe instead they should talk about some of Clint's good shit, like Every which Way But Loose. That movie rules ass. It has MMA (mixed martial arts) orangutans and slimy truckers and shit. Don't go see it on my account. It's not really all that good now that i actually think about it.
oh, Dirty Harry, the song, is cool. I don't think it's a single. That's just from listening to it. It's no Clint Eastwood. I wonder if The Automator produced it? If not, well i'll still buy it but i'll be far less enthused about the whole thing.
Is that how you spell enthused? For some reason my spell check box is gone. I spell like a twelve year old drop out.
At work this weekend, i work at the downtown library, i wasn't there at the time but some bum beat the shit out of a person, i say that like a dog bit a man. Anyhow, some dude got stamped and then he wrote some kinda letter to the paper that's getting everyone all 'riled up and stuff. I mean, it was bound to happen with the level of psycho that hang about the stacks. It's like Thunderdome( I called it that way before some haunt in Albany got the term) Now everyone in town is like, sprung into action, or at least they should be. Not that i am or anything. I'm to sullen to spring into anything but a lengthy depression.
Sometimes i wonder if the big firehose by the circulation desk is for fires or the quell a potential homeless dude gone wild, not the kind of wild that involves taking off clothes for cameras but the kind that involves phone book armor and sharpened toothbrush ends..
oh, Dirty Harry, the song, is cool. I don't think it's a single. That's just from listening to it. It's no Clint Eastwood. I wonder if The Automator produced it? If not, well i'll still buy it but i'll be far less enthused about the whole thing.
Is that how you spell enthused? For some reason my spell check box is gone. I spell like a twelve year old drop out.
At work this weekend, i work at the downtown library, i wasn't there at the time but some bum beat the shit out of a person, i say that like a dog bit a man. Anyhow, some dude got stamped and then he wrote some kinda letter to the paper that's getting everyone all 'riled up and stuff. I mean, it was bound to happen with the level of psycho that hang about the stacks. It's like Thunderdome( I called it that way before some haunt in Albany got the term) Now everyone in town is like, sprung into action, or at least they should be. Not that i am or anything. I'm to sullen to spring into anything but a lengthy depression.
Sometimes i wonder if the big firehose by the circulation desk is for fires or the quell a potential homeless dude gone wild, not the kind of wild that involves taking off clothes for cameras but the kind that involves phone book armor and sharpened toothbrush ends..
Tuesday, March 08, 2005
Rohi has started in with this real casual Mixed Martial Arts club type thing on Sundays. She said that it was fun and also that if she fits in and thinks it's all cool that i might be able to come down and throw down with some of these kids. One of them trains with Dave Terell, or at least she thinks that he does. The other one is her Aikido Sensei, and some other dude who wears tai-boxing shorts. I don't know what to make of that. I think unless i was Bolo Yeung or whoever i might not really do that but it's not for me to decide what other people wear. Even though i try like a fiend to get folks to wear shit that i dig. I'm selfish.
It might be fun. I haven't had any fights outside of bar battles and living room throw downs in ages. I wonder if my ground game is up to par anymore. I'd have to think that my techniques, though antiques are prolly outdated. my Jiu-Jitsu is very basic. I got some good sneaky leg shit that still might not be known outside the sambo world but with the way video tapes get around nowadays i doubt it.
My strikings allright. I'm fast, got a bit of pop to the body but i can't kick for shit. My takedowns are decent, takedown defense = awful but i got some nice moves outta the guard and lest anyone forget my nombre es el Corazon De Leon, werd. I just said i have a warrior spirit. Believe.
Elvis Costello :Possession
if there's anything that you want
if there's anything that you need
there's no need to be miserable
it talks and it's persuasive
possession, possession, possession
now you're sending me your best wishes
signed with love and vicious kisses
you lack lust you're so lackluster
is that all the strength you can muster
possession, possession, possession
even when we are out of touch
now I know that I've seen too much
seen to much
so all I see is that I'm back to pack
may case is closed my case is packed
I'll get out before the violence
or the tears or the silence
Every Day I Write The Book
Don't tell me you don't know what love is
When you're old enough to know better
WHEN YOU FIND STRANGE HANDS IN YOUR SWEATER
When your dreamboat turns out to be a footnote
I'm a man with a mission in two or three editions
And I'm giving you a longing look
Everyday, everyday, everyday I write the book
Chapter One we didn't really get along
Chapter Two I think I fell in love with you
You said you'd stand by me in the middle of Chapter Three
But you were up to your old tricks in Chapters Four, Five and Six
The way you walk
The way you talk, and try to kiss me, and laugh
In four or five paragraphs
All your compliments and your cutting remarks
Are captured here in my quotation marks
Don't tell me you don't know the difference
Between a lover and a fighter
With my pen and my electric typewriter
Even in a perfect world where everyone was equal
I'd still own the film rights and be working on the sequel
Every Day I Write Book
I guess i felt like including something good. I love Elvis Costello. In that i am not alone. Sometimes things become cool and timeless because they deserve it. Sometimes people are too talented to remain a secret.
It might be fun. I haven't had any fights outside of bar battles and living room throw downs in ages. I wonder if my ground game is up to par anymore. I'd have to think that my techniques, though antiques are prolly outdated. my Jiu-Jitsu is very basic. I got some good sneaky leg shit that still might not be known outside the sambo world but with the way video tapes get around nowadays i doubt it.
My strikings allright. I'm fast, got a bit of pop to the body but i can't kick for shit. My takedowns are decent, takedown defense = awful but i got some nice moves outta the guard and lest anyone forget my nombre es el Corazon De Leon, werd. I just said i have a warrior spirit. Believe.
Elvis Costello :Possession
if there's anything that you want
if there's anything that you need
there's no need to be miserable
it talks and it's persuasive
possession, possession, possession
now you're sending me your best wishes
signed with love and vicious kisses
you lack lust you're so lackluster
is that all the strength you can muster
possession, possession, possession
even when we are out of touch
now I know that I've seen too much
seen to much
so all I see is that I'm back to pack
may case is closed my case is packed
I'll get out before the violence
or the tears or the silence
Every Day I Write The Book
Don't tell me you don't know what love is
When you're old enough to know better
WHEN YOU FIND STRANGE HANDS IN YOUR SWEATER
When your dreamboat turns out to be a footnote
I'm a man with a mission in two or three editions
And I'm giving you a longing look
Everyday, everyday, everyday I write the book
Chapter One we didn't really get along
Chapter Two I think I fell in love with you
You said you'd stand by me in the middle of Chapter Three
But you were up to your old tricks in Chapters Four, Five and Six
The way you walk
The way you talk, and try to kiss me, and laugh
In four or five paragraphs
All your compliments and your cutting remarks
Are captured here in my quotation marks
Don't tell me you don't know the difference
Between a lover and a fighter
With my pen and my electric typewriter
Even in a perfect world where everyone was equal
I'd still own the film rights and be working on the sequel
Every Day I Write Book
I guess i felt like including something good. I love Elvis Costello. In that i am not alone. Sometimes things become cool and timeless because they deserve it. Sometimes people are too talented to remain a secret.
Saturday, March 05, 2005
scarf
sock?
side
shelf
Friday, March 04, 2005
i'm gonna go to the cinema today. Either we're (me and Rohi) gonna see The Aviator or Ong Bak. I kinda wanna see Ong Bak, i'm sure that the Aviator is good or whatever but really big productions just don't do it for me. I like films where people sit around and talk about shit. Not that Ong Bak is that kinda flick but given the choice between the latest Asian import chop-saki joint, (a movie endorsed by the RZA BTW) and some shit starring Leonardo Retardo Dicaprio i think i'll follow The Abbot's lead and take the first option. I wonder if it's good? I guess I won't have to wonder for long. It starts in like 2 1/2 hours so, whatever.
I think that i might be coming down with a cold. Either it's that or allergies. I think that i hope it's a cold. Colds pass, allergies linger. Linger on and on. Those of you who suffer from this shit know the deal, it sucks eggs.
Uhm, let's see what else is up? Nothing really. I'm at work for the next 15 minutes. I wonder if Maritza will be there to pick me up? She's ALWAYS late. I mean ALWAYS.. That's part of her charm, except for it's not charming. It sucks. I'm a busy man, can't be sitting around keeping score when i should be on the court throwing elbows and grabbing rebounds. I played basketball in high school. Did you know that? I was the starting forward. I'm good. Got nice ball handling skills, good moves on the inside for a five foot eight-er and can rebound like a motherfucker.
I made the squad on the basis of my defensive skills which are crazy nice, plus i can pass and prefer to do that then shoot. My outside game is ruinous. We weren't a good team, wasn't my fault. Well, i helped us suck but i wasn't the only one sucking. We had enough suction to, shit all the things i can think of to put in here are stupid porn film refrences so just use your imagination allright? Ridgway Blue Jays Ichiban.. Everyone Else number ten...
I think that i might be coming down with a cold. Either it's that or allergies. I think that i hope it's a cold. Colds pass, allergies linger. Linger on and on. Those of you who suffer from this shit know the deal, it sucks eggs.
Uhm, let's see what else is up? Nothing really. I'm at work for the next 15 minutes. I wonder if Maritza will be there to pick me up? She's ALWAYS late. I mean ALWAYS.. That's part of her charm, except for it's not charming. It sucks. I'm a busy man, can't be sitting around keeping score when i should be on the court throwing elbows and grabbing rebounds. I played basketball in high school. Did you know that? I was the starting forward. I'm good. Got nice ball handling skills, good moves on the inside for a five foot eight-er and can rebound like a motherfucker.
I made the squad on the basis of my defensive skills which are crazy nice, plus i can pass and prefer to do that then shoot. My outside game is ruinous. We weren't a good team, wasn't my fault. Well, i helped us suck but i wasn't the only one sucking. We had enough suction to, shit all the things i can think of to put in here are stupid porn film refrences so just use your imagination allright? Ridgway Blue Jays Ichiban.. Everyone Else number ten...
Tuesday, March 01, 2005
i got a card in the mail today from my friend Sara. It made me happy. I already was happy and now i am happier. She is a very nice, thoughtful girl. It's nice to have people who love you that aren't obligated by blood or whatever. Uhm i don't know where to go with this from here. I just read her blog and it was about redheads ( I love dark hair btw, dark hair and white skin. The gothier the better) and how much she digs it. Freckles, pale skin blah blah blah, then she talks about Joe her sig-ot and how much she loves him. Now here i am writing about how much i love her. What a 60's style Road To Shambala (where everybody is SO helpful and so kind) love fest. Better then my usual bile filled, anger coated, alcohol fueled musings.
Sara's Joe bought a Joy Division shirt on ebay that doesn't fit him. I think that they should give it to me.. I LOVE Joy Division and Sara thinks Closer sucks. DUDE, how can you write a music thing for the paper and not like Closer? She's weird. That's cool though.
I don't see her at all anymore and that sucks. I think now, looking back, we did not fight the enemy, we fought ourselves. The enemy was in us. The war is over for me now, but it will always be there, the rest of my days. Just like Ginny Mclaren and Rochelle fighting for what Sara called, oh i forget the rest. Go rent Platoon and add names from SCL to it...
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Sara's Joe bought a Joy Division shirt on ebay that doesn't fit him. I think that they should give it to me.. I LOVE Joy Division and Sara thinks Closer sucks. DUDE, how can you write a music thing for the paper and not like Closer? She's weird. That's cool though.
I don't see her at all anymore and that sucks. I think now, looking back, we did not fight the enemy, we fought ourselves. The enemy was in us. The war is over for me now, but it will always be there, the rest of my days. Just like Ginny Mclaren and Rochelle fighting for what Sara called, oh i forget the rest. Go rent Platoon and add names from SCL to it...